Nor is it your preferred cut of filet mignon, Eggs Benedict or five-star vegan restaurant (should that be your cup of protein).  It is a sad statement for you to hear, I know, but you’re just going to have to deal with the fact that the people you keep referring to and/or pointing at — you know, the ones who not only aren’t catering to you they aren’t even considering you — probably aren’t going to, at least not any time soon.  Sense of entitlement be-danged, you have to understand they just don’t think like you do and trust me, they are thinking even less about you and your feelings.  No matter how much you complain or obsess about it.

 

A lovely lady I know once confided that she was of a pretty advanced age before it occurred to her that others didn’t have the same sensibilities, sensitivities or seemingly the tiniest semblance of sanity that she did.  It came as quite a shock to her system to realize that while she had spent a lifetime walking through the world being mindful of not stepping on the toes of others, not everyone did and in fact, many of them were too busy stepping over bodies to see if feet were involved or not.

 

While some sweet lambs were raised in homes where “please” and “thank you” were the order of most every day, quite a few others grew up in a wolf-like Eat-or-Be-Eaten environment.  As a result, survival of the fittest doesn’t usually require that everyone puts their manners pants on one leg at a time, like you perhaps do.  So, when you encounter these dog-eat-dog individuals do you really think you can expect them to hold the door open for you as you enter/exit with an armload of packages or a baby stroller?  Are you really that surprised that they cavalierly tried to plow you down in the parking lot of the big box electronics store where the absolute best buys can be found (especially, if you apparently hurry)?  Trust me, when you sneeze these people are more concerned that you might be infecting their airspace (or their offspring) than to offer you a cursory, but polite, “Gesundheit!”  Not only do you not register on their emotional GPS, they don’t even see you, Claude Rains.

 

It is hard for me to watch the sensitive people who are hurt by the wolves of the world.  Partly, because I watch them carry that pain (be it by snub or by slur) around, refusing to set it down…wishing that things had somehow been different or wondering what they could have said or done to “make them see/hear/learn/change < insert almost any behavioral modification here >”.  Because, more often than not, the wolf moves on – not giving the wounded lamb another thought.  Yes, the savage beast is powerful, but you do know that he/she is made much more so as the initial strike (sometimes quite small) only intensifies when tended to with time and thought by the victim.  They can only plant the crabby grass seed, but you’re the one who waters and feeds it, letting it grow out of control before you know it.

 

Many of us think we can re-train the dragon by pointing out their rage-fueled bad behavior and trying to voice how that made us feel, but the sad fact is, that the hard wiring of some folks may never be re-routed to include elements of consideration, better communication and/or decent relationship skills.  One of the wisest men I’ve ever known once said, “In the end, man is left alone…with nothing” and while I understood the basic (tragic, but true) philosophy of the statement, I cannot help but think that it applies a wee bit more to those who walk through life considering none but themselves.  When day is done and they’ve spent a lifetime successfully pushing every, single breathing being away from them, of course they’ll be alone.  Maybe more than they ever thought possible.

 

Move along, little lamb.  Don’t let your heart be hurt by the words or deeds of the one who has simply moved on, leaving you alone and in pain.  What motivates their need to hurt others may be pain of their own, pain you may never comprehend and perhaps never even see.  It doesn’t excuse what they did or said, but remember that you have the ability to heal and move forward (because even if they came close, that jackass did not hit you in the parking lot, after all).