Sleeping has always been one of my most favorite hobbies, but it has been shelved in a way I never thought possible. Partly, because I’m SO okay with losing sleep these days, which is something I never would have accepted a handful of years ago. When my children were little, and any kind of meaningful sleep was a hot commodity, I would daydream about having opportunities to curl up somewhere and catch even a handful of Zzzzs. Now, the idea of catnapping is fine, but any long stretches of shut-eye makes me uncomfortable. I don’t have time to sleep. Scratch that. I don’t MAKE time to sleep.

There are simply too many things I need to do before I can sleep. Much like Robert Frost on a Snowy Evening, I’ve made some serious promises, mostly to myself, and though the woods are lovely — I aim to keep them. They’re hard commitments I’ve made, too. As a result, I’ve got a lot of miles to go to fulfill the contract I drew up in my soul.

For half a century I’ve I’ve been a storyteller, but a dozen years ago I made a vow to do so on multiple media platforms (Print! Internet! Radio! Television! Film!) and I have almost accomplished everything I set out to do:

The first thing I did was write children’s chapter books with a lovely mom and pop (actually a mom & mom) publisher in Washington. It was a lot of fun to watch my stories be nurtured by the women of Windstorm Creative. They pushed me to create story guides to accompany my books for classroom teaching and coached me to do interviews and how to set-up school visits. It was the perfect emotional snowglobe for a writer to craft and grow. Then, like a pox across the land — the small publishing houses and independent bookstores began to die. The two women of W.C. tried to rebrand and became Orchard House Press, but they couldn’t fight the big box stores and the internet. They graciously released my titles back to me as they quietly went off to pursue other jobs to sustain their own household, letting go of their cottage publishing business. I tried to self-publish, but failed miserably. [I’m now adapting them into feature family films.]

Radio was the next rolly-chair I sat in to tell my stories, becoming the afternoon drive-time voice (hence the name Afternoon T.) for a small radio station in the Santa Clarita Valley in Southern California. I loved it. As the someone who has always had one person in a room (or household) tell me I “talked too much” — radio was the perfect place for me. I’m quite proud of one night, when all of the programming equipment went down, where I kept a live mic going for 45 minutes without ANY dead air. [I was told it was pretty entertaining babbling, too.] It had its own special set of challenges — like learning to run my own soundboard (causing me to cry for the first 40 days and nights I did so), take traffic info. from multiple sources, answer incoming calls, do live interviews and a lot more — but I really, really loved it. It was a fun fishbowl to swim in, for the time I was there.

While at the radio station, I also went back to one of my first loves: Theatre. My life’s training was music and drama, so I thought I’d re-visit it and see if the muscle memory was any good. Playing Jewel in Best Little Whorehouse in Texas was a hoot, keeping my mind off of my messy divorce at the time. Playing Velma Von Tussle in Hairspray was a lifesaving distraction, during which I spent 40 days and 40 nights at the bedside of my family’s patriarch. I did a couple other musicals, but found the most rewarding experience doing immersive theater with Director Darren Lynn Bousman. It was the equivalent of boot camp for actors and it was a glorious, mind-altering, life-changing experience. Besides what it taught me as a performer, The Tension Experience: Ascension taught me to accept Los Angeles traffic (driving to and from DTLA for 5 mos. at all hours) with a weird zen-like patience I’ve never had since I got my license at the Hollywood DMV at 16. I also developed beautiful friendships with actresses of all ages (from 25 to 80+) and realized I had a lot of miles left on my own career. But, mostly during this time I learned how deep the well of strength was/is/can be. You don’t earn any money in theatre — but the gifts you get are priceless.

In the middle of all the immersive theatre shenanigans, I had a part in the creation of a short film, something that touched on every possible emotion a heart has to give and I will treasure it always. It was also during this window of time that I discovered sleep was overrated. It’s oversimplifying it, but I found dreaming is the thing you do when you slumber, but dreams are what you make when your eyes are open. My eyes were definitely opened and it has been hard to shut them ever since. Unfortunately, short films are another realm where you won’t earn any money (and it can be an absolute financial blood-letting to make them), but the education one gets is incredible.

Nowadays, I’m part owner of a small (but mighty) production company that tells stories for film, television and streaming internet platforms and it has been exhausting, but wildly rewarding. Tequila Mockingbird Productions has been busy making short films, music videos, business promos, pilots and actor’s reels for some time now and we’re currently pulling together the parts and pieces (including *cough* money) for our first feature film. While we lose sleep to pound the pavement looking for funding for our own projects, I’m super happy to say that we now have the ability to help others — who don’t have deep pockets, the ability to raise funds or rich relatives (or access to other people’s rich relatives) — to tell their stories. We can do this now through the fiscal sponsorship of Fractured Atlas.

I’ve been very busy with the business of storytelling, with not a lot of time for rest, but a fair amount for sitting, truth be told. They say the best way to write a story is to follow the rule of BIC (butt in chair) and while I’m running doing 1,001 other things, I find all the time I can to sit BIC and write. My bi-monthly advice column Afternoon T. still runs in a printed periodical in the Santa Clarita Valley and this website gets some of my time, when I’m not working on scripts or books. But, I like to tell stories, too which has led to a whole lot of standing. I spend a fair amount of time auditioning for “in front of the camera” time with the commercial work I do, answering questions as a now-and-again lifestyle model on Hallmark Channel’s Home and Family and interpreting other people’s screenplays as an actress. [Very little sitting in those worlds and not much time to rest.]

After all of the work-related storytelling, whatever free time I do get — I set aside to grab coffee or tea with family, friends and neighbors. It is so wonderful to hear their stories or share my own, if they ask. It’s an exchange of words that is greatly needed salve for my soul and is appreciated more than they may ever know. Plus, I cannot deny that I need the mug of caffeine and emotional battery re-charging to keep up the pace I’ve set for myself. Because honestly, I’ll sleep when I’m dead.

xo – t.

“I wonder why I don’t go to bed and go to sleep. But then it would be tomorrow, so I decide that no matter how tired, no matter how incoherent I am, I can skip on hour more of sleep and live.” – Sylvia Plath

“There is a time for many words, and there is also a time for sleep.” – Homer The Odyssey

“My eyelids are heavy, but my thoughts are heavier.” – Unknown