There is an actress currently on an American Soap Opera who has been on the show for a very long time (and by “very” I mean before remote controls were in play to change the channel to or from the television show she’s been on) – and since the day she was hired to be on the show there’s been a clause in her contract that she cannot gain more than five pounds.
Five pounds.
I don’t know about you, but in the very long time that I’ve been around and eating, five pounds can be the difference between not having the snack at the movie theater or going ahead and giving in to the large salted popcorn and vat of diet soda. I can look in the mirror the next morning after that and tell the arrival of that five extra pounds just by looking myself in the puffy, squinty eyes.
What madness does one have to employ to not have your weight fluctuate? EVER?! Never-ever, at the risk of losing your incredibly well-paid high profile celebrity job, ever?!
I can tell you. [I have people on the inside.]
For starters, some believe you have to eat the same rotation of food every single day. This isn’t as strange as it seems, as folks like Hugh Hefner have been doing that for decades. But, his is a life strange in a lot of other ways – so the monotonous diet seems not so strange.
The tiny little actress eats a wee carton of yogurt, half a grapefruit and coffee for breakfast; salad with a few ounces of meat (chicken, turkey, tuna, etc.) and a small portion of a similar meal for dinner. In my estimation, she seems to be sacrificing a lot of taste and variety by doing this and all told, her calorie intake is under the national recommended daily allowance. But she’s not interested in what the healthy guidelines are. She’s literally living by the seat of her pants. No, seriously. If the pants fit? That’s all she’s allowed.
Personally, I’ve had at least eight pounds (not five) that have bugged me for quiet some time, but I’m not exactly the sacrificial type. You will not catch me flinging the local princess over the rim of a volcano anytime soon, nor will I be saying goodbye to cream in my tea or buttered toast now and again.
No. I cannot adhere to such a strict diet. What I can do when those additional pounds rear their ugly head (or muffin top), especially after the long and calorie-laden holiday season is increase my activity level. I am a fan of hot yoga, but when my scale starts to scold me, I know I have to take it up a notch (as opposed to the button on my pants).
Justin Timberlake has been quoted as saying, “I mostly workout so I can eat religiously.” I agree. However, it’s not always easy to increase my cardio level when maturity, and maybe dignity, demands that I not jostle my bones or joints too greatly (though dancing to Timberlake’s music might be acceptable).
What’s a someday Golden Girl (or Guy) to do? Well, the AmericanCollege of Sports Medicine and the American Heart Association says folks under the age of 65 should be involved in “moderately intense cardio” for 30 minutes a day, five days a week or 20 minutes of “vigorously intense cardio” three times a week. Well, moderately intense means your heart rate goes up and you break a sweat while still being able to talk. I can do that. [Honestly, talking is the last thing they’ll pry from me, some great morning when this life is o’er.] The ACSM and AHA suggest that walking, swimming and the elliptical are the best ways to do this.
Allow me to share something I’ve just learned about that sounds WAY more fun that you can do with the background music of your choice: Trampoline Workouts. My sister-in-law recently suggested this and I have to say, this sounds fun.
Studies of both sedentary, middle-aged folks and highly trained athletes alike showed “modest but significant improvement in cardio fitness” as long as they engaged in regular 30 minute trampoline workouts. Now, you don’t need the gigantic ones that take up the entire backyard. You can get what they call a Rebounder or mini-trampoline (insert joke of your choice about a friend’s second cousin’s roommate that a co-worker once tried to set you up with). You can buy a mini-trampoline new for about $79 or, for half that amount, used*.
There are plenty of trampoline workouts to be found on the internet if you search and most of them will tell you that you’ll burn approximately 130-150 calories in a 30 minute session. Just so you know, that equals one ounce of half and half, a pat of butter and a slice of bread. So, I don’t ever have to give up cream tea and buttered toast. [But I also wouldn’t be caught signing a contract with a “five pound” clause.]
Ah, 2014! This could be a very good year for the bounce back (excluding that friend’s second cousin’s roommate).
“The test of success is not what you do when you are on top. Success is how high you bounce when you hit bottom.” ~ George S. Patton
“A hard fall means a high bounce… if youu’re made of the right material.” ~ Unknown